Theresa May Announces Critical Thinking To Become Class C Drug

Following lead of Texas Governor Perry, of whom she is a fan…?

Pride's Purge

(satire?)

Possession and use of free will – already banned in the US and most European countries – set to become illegal in UK

The home secretary, Theresa May, has defied her own expert advisers and announced a decision to ban independent thought, a mild stimulant that is traditionally used by Britain’s Perceptive, Cognizant and Thinking communities.

May said that autonomous thinking would become a class C drug after warning that since the US and other European countries had already banned acts of volition and personal choice, there was a serious risk that Britain could become a “single, regional hub” for the illegal onward trafficking of independent thought.

She said that the penalties for personal possession of an open mind would be similar to those for cannabis –  with a warning issued for a first-time offence, leading to arrest and prosecution for persistent possession and use of free will.

May…

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